Never-ending!

There are a few things in life that are never-ending ....

laundry

 the need to eat

and dirty dishes

 I fancy thinking about the fun things we could do, the lovely places we could go, and the money we would save, if the above mentioned were "ending." 

If we didn't eat, there would be no dirty dishes.  But not having to eat?  What would that be like?

 And what about the laundry?  Oh!  I have an idea for that one!  Disposable garbage bags!  We would have to petition Glad to make purple, pink, blue and green bags for sure, and save the black bags for funerals!   :)  This type of apparel could be hosed off and reused and when it gets holey, pitch it and get another one out of the box.

But if we didn't eat?  What WOULD it really be like?  How much time do we really put into shopping, preparing food and eating it?   And how many hours do husbands and wives have to labor to pay for it?
Finding those answers is your homework assignment for this week.  :)

I have never kept a time-card to log in and out while feeding my family, but I am positive I go into overtime!  Double overtime including laundry!  And I am positive that many of you are saying,

 "me too! me too!"  Many mom's can relate to overtime. 

 

 This was my yesterday....
(this is not my typical day)

Packaged 100# of fresh cased sausage

Fried approximately 35# of fresh loose sausage

Mixed up and baked 4 dozen sausage and egg muffins, and 4 breakfast casseroles for freezer

Curdled 4 gallon of milk into a batch of cheese

Beat 1 2/3 gallons of cream into butter

Prepared a gallon of yogurt to be fermented

The menfolk sliced 7 pans of meat pudding to put into freezer

washed and hung up umpteen loads of laundry

 threw in the oven 3 bought pizzas for supper

 Did you notice I wrote "bought pizza?"  Yep!  Bought pizza in the midst of home-made cheese and butter.  It was wonderful to not add home-made to the word pizza.  Sometimes I like "bought" over "home-made".  It is a more soothing word - it means I have more time to blog or read. :)  

And it is only because of a few cows, we are able to have milk products.  If we ever move from the farm, we would not experience a Saturday like the above ever again.

Anyway, while chugging away at those tasks, I was not patting myself on the back for any of the accomplishments, (well, I was for the bought pizza!  So glad I bought it!) but rather contemplated on whether I viewed those tasks as a blessing or curse, worthwhile effort or wasted time.

Oh, I would've much rather had my nose in a book, or rather on the Kindle that Dave gave me for Christmas.  Visiting friends or sewing would've also been a nice thing to do.

But I was stuck with food prep!

Stuck?

Is that how I felt?

No.....
(well maybe a bit a pressure was felt)

and after really thinking about it, I concluded that I was struck with a privilege!  

How dare I even think about complaining!

Due to health issues with Dave and myself, our family's diet has been tweaked quite a bit since our first married years.  And it continues to be tweaked.  Tweaking has been extremely worth the time and effort.  It has brought much improved health to both of us (will share how and why in upcoming post), however, it is not a "fast food" way of eating, as much as I wish it was.  It is much less time consuming to go to the store and buy noodles, cereal, snacks, frozen meat (and of course, pizza!) than it is to grow veggies, feed that meat on the hoof, butcher and freeze, and add healthy fats.

It is time consuming to eat healthy!

Very much so!

Is it more expensive?

Maybe we can schedule a debate on that one.

But, what are our choices?

We need to eat to live.  God made it so!

And how well we live depends on what we eat!

(and that becomes more of a believable statement the older we get)

So, the choices are:

eat healthy whole foods

or 

eat fakeprocessedwillkillyou foods

Can you mix the choices together?

Absolutely!

It will have different results for different people.

For my hubby and I, it is best not to combine the choices.

Thus, explains the up to our elbows egg, cheese and meat Saturday.

So, after a good nights sleep last night, a day of rest today,
 tomorrow I will tackle the laundry issue - again.

 I am in search of red garbage bags!  I love wearing red!

Anyone know where I can find some?

Until next time.............. 

Better Health Journey Revisited

At the beginning of 2012, I had started to share my journey to better health.
It has been a very long journey and the last time I had invited you along was on August, 2012.

Now over a year later, I am STILL traveling the rocky road to better health, but the further
along on this trip we got, the more WE realized that this trip was not for pleasure, but for education.
  I will explain later on how the "I" became "WE".

When this journey began, I was following a map to my destination of "Better Health".
My goal was to lose 30+ lbs, to be physically fit, and to feel like I was 16 again.
Those goals did not seem so outlandish, but very obtainable (well, maybe except for the "16" part of it.)

 

By 4 weeks, this vehicle was cruising along and making good time!
I remained excited until I reached a state where the tax money was not enough to put better road signs along the highway.  Further along, questions and discouragement became a travel hazard and by July I realized that the original destination to "Slender" had to be put on hold and a different route had to be considered.  A few miles down the road, I had totally cut the engine and rested at a wonderful rest area.  While resting, I made an entry in my journal about some "bad words" we learned on the trip that needed to be banned from our vocabulary.
(click on blue words to read those posts)

For a few months, my journey was pretty much uneventful.  I had restarted the engine and moved forward at a slow rate of speed.  My vehicle seemed to run rough, due to my companion, the still famous misbehaving Thyroid.  In Jan. of this year, I had joined a weight lose challenge, in which I only lost a few lbs., and in March started following the "Trim Healthy Mama" (which is a huge, very informative book written by 2 sisters) way of eating.
 I was feeling great! .......  until April!

We, our 2 youngest boys & I, were running errands, when I had the most terrifying spell!
I felt nauseous, like passing out, my body literally shook and felt like it weighed a ton, cold hands and feet, weird acting heart.  We were in the area of our Chiropractor and I managed to drive there and get help.  It was suspected that I had a hypoglycemic episode.(?)  My family Dr. did EKG - it was normal.  To make long story short, I had several more spells, which warranted a stress test - which was normal, and retesting of my thyroid labs - which were abnormal.  Doc did not want to change my meds, so I changed them on my own.  The spells diminished, however, I just did not feel well.
It was like my body was screaming "ENOUGH!  I'VE HAD IT!  I'M TIRED!"
And along with that, I now developed a fear of going away and Dave developed a fear of me driving and the boys developed a fear of being with me.  I also had a fear of having another episode, so I ate often, good food, but often, so needless to say, I found all my lost weight (just can't think about that right now).
 Added to all that, my faith took a nose dive straight into the ground.  I no longer only had questions about my health, I now had questions about my faith in God. 
When fear enters, faith exits!
 (will share later about that journey)

I heard of an Endocrinologist at Geisinger, Danville, who was supposed to be wonderful.  I had called twice to talk to the nurse to see if the Dr. does anything different than what has been done for me so far.  She reassured me that she does so I anticipated the visit with much hope.
Hope!  What a wonderful word!!

After waiting a few months, the appt. day arrived and Dave drove me to Danville.
Saw Dr. Hu and soon, REALLY soon, realized that she provided absolutely no hope for me!
She did not do anything different than any other Dr.(what was the nurse talking about?) and she even discouraged me from doing my own research.  I understand that you cannot believe everything you read, but why can't the Dr's understand that "scientific proven" is not always the only way or right way and sometimes don't even work for everyone?  There is a reason why there are so many books, websites, support groups for Thyroid and Hashimotos out there!  The medical world is not meeting the needs of thousands of people who are suffering!
So frustrating!
  Anyway, I literally cried the whole way home.
 Not only did I not receive answers, but I received no hope!
Hope!  What a wonderful word!!  (I know I repeated it..... :) )

So, my wonderful husband decided that he will just have to be my Dr..  That is how the "I" turned into "WE", for now he is traveling on this journey with me in a very active way.  He delved into studying and researching my condition and learned more than I ever did in all my research.
 tsk tsk.... naughty boy - doing all that research!  :)

 

He's the most handsome Dr. I ever had!!  :) 

One person who has been the most influential is Dr. Izabella T Wentz
She has a wonderful book, a website, blog and Facebook page. She is extremely informative and easy to understand, so if you have a journey similar to mine, I would encourage you to look her up.
Recently, we (the new Dr. Hubby & I) were able to go to a local nutritionist who spent 2 hrs. with us and gave me a road map for a different journey - a journey similar to Dr. Wentz's - a journey to heal my body, not just provide another band-aide.
So, once again, I have hope!  What a wonderful word!!!  ♥

To be continued.....

Until next time......


  

Coconut Milk Kefir

Kefir if fermented milk (cow, goat, coconut, almond, soy).  It is similar to yogurt, but little more tart and is much healthier for you than yogurt.  For more information on it, google it or go here.

I have successfully made cow milk kefir, and have been attempting to successfully make coconut milk kefir, as well.  Last week, I had made a batch using So Delicious Dairy Free Coconut Milk in a carton.  It tasted like kefir, but it kept separating and did not get thick.  Also, the down side of using that brand is all the "extra" ingredients.  This past weekend, I was able to get to store to purchase my favorite brand (below) and try another batch.  This time I used a little more culture, too, and it came out just the way I was hoping.

2 Cans of Thai Kitchen Coconut Milk - Unsweetened - heated to lukewarm. 

 I like this brand because the ingredients are simply coconut milk, water and guar gum.  No funny  stuff.  This brand is also available in "lite".  (Update: 8-8-13 - when using the lite, the kefir will separate.  Just use the full fat!  Who cares about fat - as long as the kefir don't separate!   heeeheee!  jk)

 

1/4 tsp. of Kefir Type C culture

 

1 Tbsp. unflavored gelatin dissolved in small amount of COLD water.

 

Once gelatin is dissolved, stir into warm milk along with the kefir culture.  Stir well and pour into a quart jar.  Put into oven with ONLY the oven light on.  Let incubate for 12 -18 hours.  

I held my breath, for in the past it would remain real runny and I like it thick, like yogurt.  It thickened up this time, maybe due to the increased amount of culture and full fat milk.  In fact, it is so thick that I can tip the jar and it would not run out. 

 

Pour a cup in a blender with some frozen strawberries, blueberries or fruit of choice and the outcome is soooooo yummy and healing at the same time!

Until next time.......

My Somewhat of a Secret

Oh, I just couldn't tell some people what I just had done.  No way!  I would be judged and criticized for my lack of faith.  And on top of that I felt horribly guilty and incomplete.  Over many years, the event grew dimmer and settled more into the back of my mind, until Monday the topic came up in a conversation with a friend.  The memories rolled over me and the guilt once again wanted to settle on my shoulders.

Almost 10 years ago, Oliver was born by C-section.  He was our 6th child - my 6th C-section.  Due to Ben being born emergency, the Dr's had given me a vertical incision and informed me that I would never deliver a baby naturally due to contractions possibly rupturing the incision.  For the next 5 babies, a horizontal incision was used, which created an intersection of scar tissue.  For our last 3 children, we had an agreement with the Dr's that they would give their "medical" opinion on whether we could have any more children.  All was fine until I carried Oliver and upon delivery they discovered a "window" in my uterus at the intersection.  We had prayed that the Lord would speak through the Dr. and she strongly advised us to have no more children.  With Dave by my side, we mutually agreed and gave consent for them to give me a tubal ligation.  The risks of another pregnancy could mean the lives of me and the baby.  Dave was not interested in raising our 6 children alone and had total peace about our decision.  However, later that day, the reality of what a tubal ligation really meant hit me hard, REALLY hard.  A stage of my life was over at the hands of a Dr.. An amazing part of my female body would no longer function properly.  Oh, the Dr. did not warn that the side effects would be emotional turmoil.  In their minds, and in their books, this procedure is simple, convenient and side effect free.  Not for me, nor my dear friend who, I discovered Monday in our conversation, had the same procedure.  At the time of our procedures, we both knew that there were people out there that stood firm on the thought that God controls the family size - you don't intervene, and faith brings you through any hardship.  Those beliefs are facts.  God does want us to have children and faith does bring us through hardship.  But what about a situation like the ones we faced?  Did we not have faith?  Did we not trust Him?  Years ago, I had decided it would be best to keep our decision secret from certain people than to face the criticism.  However, it had taught me not to judge others in their decisions, for unless I walk in their shoes and they in mine, we cannot fully understand each others decisions. 

A few years after Oliver was born, I had looked into having a reversal.  It was possible, I found a Dr. who would do it, filled out necessary forms (to the dismay of my OB GYN, who firmly reminded me that I was extremely high risk and do I seriously want another baby)?  No, I really didn't, but I felt like I had to undo what was done, or maybe I should say redo what I had undone. We needed $5,000.00 and I prayed, "God, if you provide the money, I will have it done."  I soon found out our insurance would pay for it!  However ............  I chickened out ...... I drug my feet ...... what if I do get pregnant ....... what if I die ...... what if the baby would need heart surgery too ....... I feel too old .......

Soon, the insurance no longer covered it and we didn't have the money.

Life moved on, but then I secretly carried another guilt.  I lied to God!  I said I would and I didn't.  Does God forgive that?  

So, Monday's conversation brought back all those feelings and questions.  And once again tears flowed.  "Lord, am I forgiven?"  I know I serve a loving, forgiving Father, but I deliberately did not follow through on my deal with Him.  Then this small voice whispered....... remember Peter?  Ahhh, my Peter! My favorite disciple in the Bible! 

"Though all men shall be confused because of thee, yet will I never be confused," says Peter to Jesus.  "Verily I say unto you, That this night, before the cock crow, you shall deny me 3 times," answers Jesus.  Peter said back to Him, "though I should die with thee, yet will I NOT deny thee," 

Further on in Matthew 26, you will soon find that Peter did not follow through on his deal with Jesus.  He denied Him 3 times, the cock crowed, Peter heard, remembered and wept bitterly with repentance.  Jesus forgave Peter and in John 21:15, you find the proof.  The lie that he told Jesus and then the 3 lies of denial, were buried way down in the depth of forgiveness.  And so is mine!  I am set free from the guilt of the past, my secret is no longer a secret, and my body is whole even in it's brokenness. 

  Thank you, my sweet Heavenly Father!

Until next time........        



Huh? Say What? (continuation of health journey)

Methylisothiazolinone, Cyclopentasiloxane, Bisphenol-A, Diethanolamine, Monoethanolamine, Triethanolamine, DMDM hydantoin, Isopropyl Alcohol, Sodium Lauryl sulfate.  How did you fare?  Were you able to pronounce any of those words?  No?  Ummmm........Well, maybe we would have learned them if we would have taken a class on toxic materials for that is what they are.  The sad part of it is that these toxic materials are found in the shampoos, deodorants, and other personal items that we use. 

Now, lets try this set of words - Potassium Bromate, Sulfur Dioxide, BHA and BHT, Sodium Nitrate/Sodium Nitrite, Monosodium Glutamate, High Fructose Corn Syrup, Aspartame, Curcumin Erythrosine, Vanillin.  Some of these may be easier to pronounce, but they are as toxic as the first list.  The only difference is that these are found in foods that grace the supermarket shelves and are consumed by human beings.    I do not want to go into detail of what they are, but I would highly encourage you spend some time with "Google" and you may be very surprised!

Our family's chemical-free quest began many years ago.  We were experiencing some frustrating times in our schooling with difficulty learning and behaviour issues.  Dave happened to hear a commercial on the radio for the Feingold Diet and after we researched it, we were convinced to give it a try.  From there, we started learning even more about food ingredients and better food choices.  Over time we have witnessed an increase in public awareness of this issue and some manufacturers and food producers making changes according to people's interest.  However, most have not, for it is easier and cheaper to use the chemicals.  Even though we have adopted Dr. Feingold's way of eating ever since, and have removed even more foods, like hydrogenated oils and "white" stuff, we have never addressed what we were putting on our skin until within the last few months.  In my research of thyroid issues, it became very evident that what we put ON our bodies, and not just what we put IN our bodies, has an effect on our health.  After all, how do we de-worm a cow or dog?  By pouring dewormer down their backs along the spine and it is absorbed through the skin into their system.  What about wearing a patch for car sickness or for other health issues?  Whatever is on patch gets absorbed into the skin to do its job.  Our skin is porous (very obvious) so it absorbs all the toxic chemicals named at the beginning of this post right into our systems as well!  Some of them attack the nervous system, while others attack the endocrine system and others cause severe allergic reaction.  It always amazes me that drinking raw milk is considered by "certain" people to be a health hazard, but nothing is said about the poisons that the USDA approves to put in our foods and personal care items.  Maybe that kind of thinking is the result of using too much toxic filled shampoo!  heehee!  No, wait! It's not funny!  It is madness!  Maybe we should take a closer look at those labels, do our own research and say, "out with store bought shampoo, out with the fluoride toothpaste, out with the paper mill waste called "vanillin", out with food colorings and preservatives, and in with products that can be pronounced by a first grader."  Yup, by people who do not have a bachelors degree in English!  I will share the changes we made and some recipes, but, sorry, you will have to wait.....

Until next time........

It Is Not Mine Anyway!

No, it really isn't!  I once thought it was, but to tell you the truth, I don't want it back.  I did not build it, but Someone else did and that Someone else knows far more about it than I do.  He took great care in the architecture layout and has designed it so amazingly! His plans from the beginning were to take up residence in it and stay for as long as He is made welcome.  My responsibility is to keep the doors wide open, to keep it clean, pure and surrendered to the Designer.  Can anyone guess the riddle?

In my recent post of my thyroid story, I shared some of the parts of my journey in trying to find "Better Health".  Since that post, I came to realize that something seriously was missing.  I had become consumed in frustration, bitterness and un-thankfulness, which only added to the "sickness".  I was trying to do it alone.  The big bad  I was searching for answers and attempting to find healing solutions for my body and I was totally leaving the designer out in the cold. I felt so defeated and then conviction took hold of me.  Change!  I needed to make some changes   So, I started over in my quest by repenting, thanking God for all the trials He brings into our lives, and then surrendering my body, my sickness, my healing to the One whose temple it is by receiving the healing annointing of oil.   This should have been my first step and the first one I recommended to you before any search of a good book, a good website and an earthly Physician.  The Architech, the Builder of this vast universe, of all living things, who knows all the stars, knows the number of hairs on my head, has designed each amazing cell in my body and I wonder if I can trust Him?!  Can I not just trust Him in some things, but in every single thing in my life?  Sigh!  I want Him to be able to walk into every room of my heart and every fiber of my being and find a welcoming mat to wipe His feet and a recliner to rest in.  This earthly body is His residence, and I want Him to use it however He deems best and be glorified, whether healthy or sickly, rich or poor, skinny or chubby!  :-)    I want to be able to say as Job did "even though He slay me, still will I trust Him".  I have come to realize though, that this is not a once and done surrender.  It is daily and sometimes hourly, and when I start to be tempted to do it alone, I hope I can always remember that being in that position only opens the doors to anything but peace, joy and happiness.   Does this surrender mean then that I can eat and treat my body half-hearted and with carelessness?  If our bodies are to be called a temple of the Lord, then 1st Chronicles 29:1-5 will give us an idea of how important the input is. 

To be continued......

Until next time........

Sabotaged!

I have not updated about my journey to Better Health since March and you probably wondered if I careened into a ditch somewhere and got forever lost.  Well, I haven't got lost and I am still on the road, even down 2 more #'s, but I have been sabotaged by this companion that was traveling with me.  He has been very influential in my life and sometimes he treats me good and other times he is a menace.   He has caused me to divert my full attention from Diet Highway 101 to the paralleling route of Highway Metabolism.  My companion's name is Thyroid and I knew it was time for me to get at the bottom of our relationship and find out why he has to be so disagreeable. 

I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism after our first child, Ben, was born in 1989.  Read the beginning of the story here.  At the end of that post in Feb. 2011, my med dose was being decreased.  Over the next year, they went up again.  So, I was back on the roller coaster and becoming increasingly frustrated.  I made an appt. with a specialist, who charged me hundreds of $'s to not tell me anything I didn't already know!  Plus, he didn't really care what I had to say, HE was the Dr. and HE knows me better than I know myself - NOT!  Back to family Dr., who changed my meds once more and than informed me that I really do need to see a specialist. I cannot describe how totally exasperated I felt.  Is there really nobody out there that knows to do anything different than keep putting a band aide on this problem, plus care what their patients have to say?  All blood tests that I had done this year so far, have come back with me being borderline hyper, which means I needed my meds reduced.  My exercise regiment ended, for I was once again having chest and shoulder pain and when I would do any exercising I thought my heart would be beat out of my chest.  I realized that for me to find answers and help, I would need to do it myself, which I should have done years ago.  So, I turned to Google, books from the library, and any other info that I can get my hands on.  I spent days sitting at the computer desperately searching for answers that many other's seemed to be looking for, too.  One day, God whispered in my ear that I should seek help from a mid-wife.  Would a mid-wife understand hormones better?  Be more open to other options?  I contacted one locally and to make a long story short, they can do my blood work, order tests that I want, order the dose that I know I need, and they are excited to learn right along with me.  They are accountable to a med. Dr., who is VERY willing to listen to his patients and take their suggestions to heart.  Exciting!!  Through my research, I learned of other blood work that Dr's. should also take when the thyroid function is in question, but rarely do they order them.  It is so much easier to use that band aid instead of fixing the root illness.  When the test results came back, they revealed that I have Hashimoto's, which is an auto-immune disease that is caused by allergies, stress, toxins, and a few other things.  The disease attacked my thyroid and caused hypothyroidism.  One of the symptoms that I have been experiencing for years was the tremendous fluctuation in TSH levels - hypo to hyper - back & forth.  Ahhhh....that's me and finally I have an explanation and hopefully a solution.  An elimination diet is suggested - gluten, dairy, grain free.  Eat lots of veggies, fruit and meat!  And make some lifestyle changes.  I am still in the learning stage, so I will continue to share info. with you as I learn it.

So, do I still want to lose weight?  Absolutely! But, for me to do that, I have to also focus on getting my metabolism to work properly or the journey would be next to impossible.  I have new motivation to stay clear from wheat and sugar!  And to share my story in hopes of helping others who are also traveling this frustrating road with a companion who is at odds with them, too.  I want to encourage you who may be suffering with this to do your research, go to your Dr. and ask for the tests that you want.  He may think you are off your rocker, but don't let that intimidate you.  And if he does not listen, find someone who will.   Also,  I am reminded that we have a Great Physician who can heal even the worst disease, who hears all our concerns and who cares greatly for us.  My thoughts have been on a certain woman who had suffered for 12 years with bleeding.  She made her way through a crowd of people and said "if I may but touch his garment, I shall be whole".  And Jesus said to her "Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole" and she was healed!  Matthew 9:20  I love that story and I want that kind of faith, also!     

To be continued......

     Until next time.......     

My Rich Husband

There was an American missionary and his thin wife who went to Africa to live.  An African man came up to him and asked him how much he paid for his wife.  The American proudly replied that he didn't pay anything, his wife was free.  The African replied, "I thought so, I wouldn't have paid anything for her either!"  You see, over in Africa if you have a chubby wife, it was a sign that you are wealthy.   What a concept!  I informed my hubby that he is a rich man after all!  heehee! Many of you have probably watched the movie "Fiddler on the Roof."  Do you remember the song "If I were a Rich Man?"  One of the stanzas begins with these words,

I'd see my wife, my Golde, looking like a rich man's wife
With a proper double-chin.

Oh, my goodness!  a proper double-chin!  The whole idea strikes my funny bone.  If a chubby wife gives the world the impression that her husband is a rich, wonderful provider, why are so many of us women-folk setting goals that will make our husbands look poor?  Who is influencing us anyway?  Who dictates who is "fat" and who isn't?  Our society?  The government?  The medical field?  Which country you live in?  Maybe we should ask each of our husbands what they think we should look like and set our goals accordingly.  Which maybe I should take back those words, for my hubby don't have a problem with me being "chubby", it's me having a problem with it.  Is he supportive of me wanting to lose weight?  Yes, but only for the reason he wants me to feel better and improve my health.   Which brings me to updating my journey to that end.  First, I want to clarify something.  Am I meaning to degrade thin people and say they are poor?  Nope!  I want to be thin and some husbands love thin.   It can be a matter of opinion and different perspectives.      

While on my journey, I have become stuck at a roadside rest with a flat tire for weeks now!  I must have run over a nail in one of my detours.  Or, let's see, another excuse could be is that my dog ate the map.  Yep, that must be it!  It's all because of that nail and my dog that I am still sitting here not moving forward.  The good news is that I haven't backtracked either.  Stuck!   but, really whose fault is it?  My own!  This journey has made me feel mentally exhausted at times.  It requires thinking and sometimes I feel like I can't think anymore.  Let's see....don't eat that, eat this....but I don't have "this" right now, it's still at the store.....eat at this time, but at "this time" I am doing something else, I would rather eat at "that" time.....what can I pack for a snack when I have to be on the road.....need a protein along with a fat along with a grain along with some veggies along with some fruit.......I need more time in the kitchen......when should I take my walk.......I need to remember what I ate so I can write it down, write it down, write it down.......  ssscccrrreeeaaammm!!!

Stop!  Refocus, get another copy of the map, get rid of dog, change the tire, start the van and pull out on that highway once more, for while on the highway is when I feel the best - that is what I want to do.  I want the road to be clear of all obstacles, with huge road signs that prevent me from taking the wrong exit.  I want my husband's reputation is stay in tack, so I will be reasonable in my goals.  : )  All these I wants are goals, but I will refuse to stress and be miserable about them.   Which brings another story to mind.  On a radio talk show a question was asked, "would you rather be fat and happy, or skinny and miserable?"   One man called in and said "I would rather be skinny and miserable" and the host ask "why?"   "Because now I am fat and miserable and if I am going to be miserable either way I would rather be skinny."

Until next time..............

Down The Wrong Alley!

So, I was speeding right along on Highway Diet 101 towards Better Health when some distractions caught my attention out the side window.  I slowed down and realized I was at the intersection of Birthday Party Alley and Highway Diet 101! I so stupidly decided to take a detour down the alley, which was lined with shops called Birthday Cake, Tortilla Shop (stuffed with apple filling), and Chips Galore! (we did have fresh veggies and fruit, also).  As I passed each one, I just had to stop in and taste test their products!  One bite led to another and another.  Uuuhhhh!  Why, oh why didn't I have the strength to squeal my tires in haste to get away from that intersection and keep heading for my destination.  Well, the detour lasted all weekend into Monday!  I got lost on Homemade Pierogi Ave., Chocolate Fountain St., and ended up on Nibble Interstate where it became clear that I was paying the price for my curiostiy.  By Monday evening, I was feeling defeated, but my dear hubby and sons encouraged me that "tomorrow is a new day, just start again."  Over the last 2 weeks, I had become lazy in doing my trackers (a sheet that I write down everything I eat and the times I do so).  Tuesday morning arrived with new grace (and self forgiveness) and a new tracker got put on fridge and blinders strapped to my head :) heehee!  Today went much better and I feel like I am back on track.  The whole incident made me realize that I CANNOT cheat.  My body reacts to the sugar and wheat and self control flys right out the back window.  I also realize that I am not as strong  fighting temptations as much as I wish I was.  It reminds me of how sin can enter into our lives - oh, just one little sentence of gossip, just one little peek at the immoral picture, oh, thats not really cheating is it and it's only a white lie!  Surely just alittle won't hurt!  And before you know you are sucked into the racecar traveling pellmell down avenues you thought you would never travel!  May we find strength to not become distracted by the luring shops that seem to line the streets we travel each day.

On a good note, I am still walking and becoming physically stronger!  Not 7 days a week, but most days.  The weather has been so nice that we have been able to walk outside.  Thought I would share the view that we (the boys go with me) have when we walk on the street.  Much better than here's a cow, there's a cow, everywhere's a cow cow - 42 times around the barn!

Starting at house, we truck up this long hill.....

Down this side..                                                                                                                                         

Up to town.... turn around, go back up hill (above pic)                                                                    

and back down this hill......                                                                                                                    

past our house to neighbors lane and back to house again ...                                                                       

                                                                        

This is our farm from on top of the hill....                                                                                                   

As far as weight and inches lost? I didn't lose any more in the last 2 weeks and will not measure until 2 more weeks.  This journey has gotten harder here lately, but I will keep my goals and do my best.  What more can I do? 

Until next time. . . . .  .

4 Week Update on Getting Healthy

Today marks 4 weeks since I started my get healthy journey.  I am not sharing this because I have "arrived" nor because I think I now have the best road map.  I am sharing it for a few reasons....I need to be accountable to people and by making this public I will be less tempted to go down the alleys.  This blog is also my diary where I keep record of the highlights of our lives here on the farm and in our personal lives.  I know that losing weight is not an easy thing and all of you who may be thinking about starting your journey, or may have already started it - it is good to have a cheering squad and to encourage one another.  Whether you have 10, 35, 75 or over 100 lbs. to lose, the experience is the same.  Habits have to be examined and changed (and that is no easy feat!), nutritional knowledge has to be learned, and a drive and determination has be present.

I am going to be vulnerable .....what finally drove me to seeking help was the fact that my eating was wwwaaayyy out of control.  I had become so disgusted with myself, with my lack of self control, with not liking what I saw in the mirror, and being limited in my physical activities.  Dear friends, you don't need to guzzle alcohol, snort drugs, or view pornography to be called an addict!  Oh, no!  Addictions can come quite close to home and we turn our backs on them and call them a "weakness" or some other name that makes us feel more righteous than drunks, druggies, and perverts.  Addiction is addiction is addiction.  Same control, same power!  I am not a expert on "addictions", but there is something in all of them that effect our physical (and emotional) bodies and drive us back for more, more, more!

For weeks before my journey, I spent my days feeling hungry all the time!  I was addicted to eating.  Never satisfied!  I hated it!  I sought help and I will briefly tell you what was mapped out for me.  For the first week, every day I had to have 6 servings of vegetables, 3 fruit, 3 grains, 3 milks, 6 proteins and 3 fats. NO SUGAR! And I was to walk 1 mile every day.  I felt better for the first 2 days and then those "hungries" came back full force.  It is horrible to diet when hunger is present all the time.  My nutritionist made some changes the 2nd week.  No milk, more protein and walk 40 minutes every day. The next day - still hungry all the time and feeling lightheaded and giddy.  She took me off all wheat and added a fat.  I immediately felt much better and best of all, I was not hungry, however, I had to eat every 4 hours or my blood sugar would drop.  Believe me, that is worse than the hungries!  By the end of the 3rd week, I felt significantly better. In the 4th week, I could go longer than 4 hours without eating and when I do eat I can hardly eat all the food I am suppose to.  I am still off milk, wheat and sugar and food no longer controls me - I control the food and that makes me extremely happy.  According to my nutritionist, sugar is addictive and with me, so is wheat.  Both effected my body to create the "addictions". The more sugar and wheat - the more hungry I was.  I have lost 9.8 lbs.  (25.2 to go), and 8 1/4 inches.   It has been worth it so far!    To all my fellow travel companions - hang in there!

Until next time...........

My Journey to Better Health

Sigh!  Were you ever on a trip that seemed more like you were on a roller coaster rather than a highway?  You have a destination in mind, a vision of how wonderful it will be to "arrive". You pack your bags, load the van, and look around for your map.  Well, there is Rand McNally Atlas, National Geographic Atlas, and Michlin Atlas to pick from. Which one to choose?  Which is the easiest one to follow?  Hopefully they all have the same information, but maybe, just maybe there are some differences.  Well, there are more, many many more, "atlas es" out there proclaiming that their highways are the best to travel to arrive at better health.  Just follow their directions and you will pull right up at your totally healthy, sleek-looking, drug-free destination.  They must all be correct, for they each have wonderful testimonies from people who have traveled their roads right to the perfect ending.   I have traveled with some of those "atlas es" - one by Dr. Atkins, another by Diana Schwarzbein, still another by Sally Fallon.  For some reason, I always ended up at the same destination - the city of Frustration!  So, instead of finding the atlas that was right for my journey, I gave up on all of them and wondered down the road of Don't Care Anymore.  Ever been on that road?  Oh, you have perfect freedom - feeling sad? Eat! Feeling happy? Eat! Mad? Eat!  Who cares??  But, soon you realize you're not alone, for every so many miles you gain another companion - and their names are all the same "Add Another Pound"!   They are sneaky companions!  They sneak up on you and latch on without you realizing it and all of a sudden! you look at yourself and wonder how on earth you ended up with all these companions!   Oh, dear friends, it is not a fun destination!  For some of us, desperation sets in and we are tempted to keep traveling on the road named Don't Care Anymore, but we now realize it is lined with enemies waiting to attack us and make us more sick and weak. 

Many of you know that I have thyroid issues for 23 yrs. and for about 5-6 years now I have been having trouble getting my levels to stay at an even keel, where I feel good for a long period of time.  I have also weighed the same for the last 6 years.   My desire is to lose 35 #'s in hopes of helping my thyroid function better and for me to be more healthy.  I know that may not sound like much to lose, but it is enough to be difficult for me. The first thing I knew I needed to do was to find someone to be accountable to, someone who could help me get a personalized map for my journey.  I visited a nutritionist and she mapped me a travel plan.  It had to be tweeked a few times since then (which was 3 wks ago), but I have learned alot.  Portion sizes are the biggest thing that has got my attention.  3 cups of veggies is alot of veggies! An ounce of bread is next to nothing.  3 oz. of meat can fill you up, 1/2 banana is a serving of fruit. Wheat makes me hungry all the time, and beans for breakfast are wonderful.  I have also learned that I have low blood sugar and if I don't eat every 4 hrs. I am in trouble.  Another discipline that has been really good for me is I have to walk for 40 min. every day.  I love to walk and I love to walk on the road, however, if it is raining or really cold, I walk in the barn.  Well, yet another thing I have learned is 40 minutes (2 miles) walking in the barn is about more than I can bear!  :) It is 42 times around and around and this is my view......up one side

down the other......

I have my challenges on this journey.  I am tempted to go down Chocolate Ave., and Donut Lane.  They beckon to me and leave me under the impression that just alittle detour won't hurt, but I know that if I am serious about reaching my destination, I cannot be looking out my side windows, but straight ahead toward the goal.  I have left a few pounds behind in the dust already, which my nutritionist says is almost a miracle because of my thyroid, but I so want to reach my destination and to do that I have to travel this road, sometimes roller coaster, that will get me there.  Only with God's strength and His timing! . . . . . . . . . . . .

Until next time. . . . . . . .

Rainy Days, Heartburn, Old Friends, a Treat

Sunday, 20 March 2011

• Rainy Days, Heartburn, Old Friends, a Treat

  Ummm....interesting title.....so, am I indicating that old friends cause heartburn on rainy days while eating a treat?  Nope!  Just updating on what has been happening around here.
  I love rainy days!!  I love to hear the rain on a tin roof and smell the wet earth.  But, most of all, I love rainy days when indoor projects get done because the men can't work outside.  That was what happened at the beginning of last week.  We had a bedroom wall that was unfinished.  The logs needed to be chinked and it was one of those projects that just did not have priority - until now.  Last summer we had wasps in our bedroom too many times and they were able to come in from the attic eves through an unchinked space.  So, Dave put it high on the priority list.  He also decided that it was something that the boys really could learn to do and so it became a great elective for school....learning to chink logs.
  The before picture....
  
  project underway...
  
  
  After....
  
  They did an excellent job and I expect no wasps this year!   Another project that got finished (almost, still needs trim) on a rainy day was a wall between the mud room and rest of porch. 
  Preparation...
  
  We were blessed with a free, beautiful door that someone had put out at their mailbox for free.  It worked perfect!  Once again, Dave thought the boys could learn some skills, so....another elective....learning to hang a door.
  
  
  There are MANY more projects that need done in the house, so bring on the rain!   No, seriously, our house really does need lots more work, but slowly it is getting there.  It is not new, not perfect, but it is our HOME and that is what matters.
  Heartburn.....for many, many years it has been Dave's companion and not a welcome one, either.  As the years progressed, it became more & more frequent until it was an every day thing.  For a long time, we thought it was all stress related.  Then, we started really thinking that it wasn't just stress, but also something he was eating.  Was it the eggs in the morning?  Or dairy?  Maybe meat?  The last few months it had gotten so severe that he was eating next to nothing and still got heartburn.  He was convinced he had cancer, for now he not only had heartburn, he had stomach pain.  He tried the prilosec and got relief, until a week after he finished it.  Anyway, something had to be done and he wanted to try something else before seeing a specialist.  Well, he is now heartburn free!!!  Praise the Lord!!  What was the culprit?  Wheat!  As soon as he took all wheat out of his diet the heartburn and pain was gone.   One time he thought he would test it and ate a piece of homemade bread and pronto! heartburn.  He can now eat whenever he wants and anything he wants, but wheat, and he does great.  We can't believe it!  After all these years and it was wheat?  Why, oh why, didn't we think of it sooner?
  Time marches on, we get older, our families grow, we make new friends and some things are forgotten.  However, some things are not forgotten and they live on through all the circumstances of life.  That is how it is for the friendship of 4 women.  "Us" 4 women.  We have known each other since the beginning of our lives and have grown up together.  Each of us eventually got married and somewhat went separate ways.  However, every now and then we get together and reconnect.  This week, we were able to have lunch together again.  2 of us are grandmas now and all of us have been through different trials and changes in our lives.  It was really nice to catch up and enjoy a few short hours together.
  24 1/2 years ago at my wedding....Karla, Marcy, me, & Dawn
  
  2011..... Marcy, Dawn, Karla, & I
  
  Eating out twice in 1 week?  wahoo!  I can stand it!  Last night, Gordon and Kelsey took Dave & I out to eat for part of our Christmas present.  The choice was ours and after much deliberating it was Golden Corral.  Our opinion?  uhhh.....not first pick.  Hoss' still ranks among #1.  We had a really nice time, just the 4 of us.  Thanks to our favorite daughter & son-in-law for the treat! 
  
  Until next time................

My Thyroid Story

Wednesday, 23 February 2011

• My Thyroid Story

  Ah...the little innocent gland that controls the whole body.  If it is in good working condition, you feel good.  If it is working over time, your heart pounds like you ran a mile just by going up the steps, your hair starts falling out, you feel hyper, you can't sleep and get up in the middle of the night to tell others about it on a blog :) and a myriad of other symptoms.  If it is being lazy, you have similar symptoms as overactive, including brain fog, inability to think straight, or to think at all, just want to sleep, a menses that last 2 weeks, weight gain and a myriad of other symptoms.   See why I think it controls the body?   This gland is located in your neck right here....
  

  

  See this website for more info. on ithttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thyroid.  My purpose for this post is not to medically teach you about the thyroid, but to share my personal story of what life is like when it does not function well.  I would be delighted if, through sharing this, it helps just one person who may have similar symptoms find the correct diagnosis and get the help that is available.
  Knowing what I know now, I would say that my thyroid story began when I was a teen, even though I was not diagnosed until I was around 23 years old.  The signs were mild, but they were beginning.  I would feel panicky and fearful about things.  After we got married, which means I got older :), the signs increased.  My fears and panic attacks increased and my first severe episode was when I woke up in the middle of the night and begged Dave to call the ambulance, for I was dying!  He called my parents instead (smart man!) and they came over and helped to calm me down.  These episodes increased and did not limit themselves to the middle of the night.  We soon moved into Strausstown and I remember thinking that I could not drive down main street, for the houses would fall in on me.  Yep!  You guessed it!  Poor Dave thought he married a crazy woman!  I read a really good book that helped describe what happens in your body when you have a panic attack and provides ways to deal with them - "Hope and Help for Your Nerves" by Claire Weekes.  Because of the book, I was able to live my life and not be totally controlled by my attacks.   I had Ben, we moved out of town, and my condition worsened.  Ben spent 98 days in the neonatal unit at Reading and I remember driving down (I would drive myself every other day and the other day I would go with Dave in the evening).  Anyway, I would get down there, stare at my teeny tiny little man and wonder how on earth I got there and how on earth I was going to get home.  I thought I would need to call someone to come for me, for I was physically and mentally exhausted!  I know that this kind of situation would make anyone exhausted and stressed and I believe that it was the straw that brought the camel's back.  I could not do my housework, and all I wanted to do was sleep.  Finally, I went to the Dr. (don't ask me why I waited so long - I think I was chalking it up to the stress), for I needed to tell him that I was anemic and needed help (yep, I was one of those dreaded patients that thought I could diagnose myself).  He took one look at me and told me I had a thyroid problem.  He was correct and I started to feel better within 2 weeks of starting meds..  That was 22 years ago and the beginning of this wild roller coaster ride of finding the correct dose of meds.  After every baby was born, my symptoms would return, my dosage would increase and since Oliver (who is 8) was born, it increased  more than once until it had reached the high dose of 225 mcg.  I had times of great frustration (still do) about this condition wondering what caused my thyroid to dysfunction in the first place.  Was it my diet, was it stress, was it inherited?  And then why can't we get it regulated and be able to stay on the same dose forever?  Are there alternatives to meds?  (don't go there) and does stress cause dysfunction or dysfunction cause stress?  I have become so familiar with the symptoms that I know when I need to have blood work done.  My first symptom will be mental - the brain fog, the inability to make decisions, can't think and process things, can't remember names and simple things that I know that I know. I will experience morbid thoughts and slight panicky feelings (which have disappeared after being on synthroid).  Physical symptoms will be that my heart will feel like it is pounding out of my chest or not pounding enough, pain in my shoulders and chest, change in my menses, and moods, and can't sleep.  Or I will be so tired that I am afraid that I won't wake up if I do go to sleep.  Do you know that some believe that a large percentage of women that were in the mental institutes years ago simply had an undiagnosed thyroid disorder?  Thankfully, Dr.'s have become more knowledgeable about this disease and now we are able to be mental but stay in our own homes!  No, honestly, I have often wondered what is normal and if I will ever experience it. Oh, by the way, what is "normal"?  I need to know so that I can recognize it when I arrive there.  Enough joking!  It's not funny!  :) Well, anyway, here recently, within the last year, something has been changing.  I became symptomatic, had blood work and it came back low, which means I need to lower my dose to 200mcg.  Took that dose for awhile - another test - again too low, lower dose to 175.  Took that dose for awhile, can't remember how long (thats part of the disease)- another test - too low - lower dose to 150.  By this time, I am amazed.  I cannot tell you, without seeing my medical records, the last time I was on 150!  Well, I was on 150 for about 6 weeks and I knew the Dr. blew it this time for taking me too low.  Boy, do I hate the brain fog!!  So, does my family - "mom, I told you that already,"  "mom, what is to eat?  I don't know I can't think about that" "oh, I totally forgot.." "mom, can we do this or that?  after long delay.... I don't know..."  Whew!  Time for more blood work.  Yesterday, I got the results.....too low, lower dose to 125!  I'm blown away!  I have not been on that dose for years and years!!  What is happening?  Is God choosing to heal me?  I did not lose weight, we have been eating healthy for years, our lifestyle hasn't changed.  The only thing is that I started seeing a different chiropractor and have been under his care for some time.  I don't believe in the hocus pocus stuff that some chiropractors do (my chiropractor don't either), but I do believe that pinched nerves have a huge effect on the area where the nerves are feeding into.  Now, I have more questions, but I am very happy in the direction things are going.  I don't know the reason why the direction changed, but I am very thankful to the Great Physician.  Sad to say, I will remain sceptical for the next few months to see what happens.  "Oh, ye of little faith..."  That's me, I guess!
  Until next time.............

Eenie, Meenie, Minie, Moe

Saturday, 15 January 2011

• Eenie, Meenie, Minie, Moe

  Eenie, meenie, minie, moe, catch a diet by it's toe, if it fails, try another, eenie, meenie, minie....oh! bother!  The whole subject of losing weight is quite popular this time of year.  The new year rolls around and everyone is reminded on how they failed to keep off weight or lose weight in the past year and they determine that the coming year WILL be different.  I fall into the "everyone" and I suspect that some of you do, too.  I have been doing research and thinking about the epidemic of overweight people and I am (or was) attempting to try to figure it all out.   Did you know that it is better to eliminate all the fats, meats, dairy (including eggs), from your diet and eat mostly complex carbs, veggies and only 3 servings of fruit a day?  You will lose weight really fast and be filled with energy?  Oh, did you know that you should cut out most of your carbs, but eat fats (the healthy kinds), veggies and some fruits and you will lose weight and be filled with energy?  By the way, did you know that if you eat soup and vary some of the ingredients so you don't get bored, you will lose weight and be filled with energy?  I almost forgot...did you know that you should eat NO carbs, but eat LOTS of eggs, fats, meats and veggies and you will lose weight and be filled with energy?  Or, maybe, you should know that you should eat mostly raw foods, including some meats, lots of healthy fats, fermented everything and you will lose weight and be filled with energy?   Better yet, eat whatever you want, but cut your portions in half.  And they all work, I know because I read the testimonies.  So, you are saying you didn't know all that?  Where have you been all these years?
  We live in the land of Options.  We can go into any grocery store and choose from a huge selection from all the food groups.  Need a new car?  Well, which one do you want?  How about a church, or clothing store, or whatever......and of course, we want the best bargain.  So we spend much time, much money, and too much energy into finding and making the perfect choice.  The world of dieting has joined the ranks of obsessive searching for the best bargain.  The one that promises to quench that fleshly desire of looking slim and sleek and fit for the billboard - fast!  And through it all, people are making big money giving completely opposite information from the next guy who has discovered that humans are very gullible folks!
  Now, back in my high school days (let's see, I can't remember when that was), it was such a shame to be even slightly overweight.  Double chin?  Do this exercise.  Thighs rubbing?  Buy the exercise gadget that hangs over the back of your door.  Now, I am seeing a different story.  The Dr. told me that they changed the charts, so now we aren't expected to be so skinny.  And I just read an article questioning the myth that obesity will kill you.  Why, us folks that are chubby are healthier than those slim, sleek Kens & Barbies!  Oh, you didn't know that either?  You definitely have been out of the loop.  Loop?  What loop?  Which one?  Which ever one you want to find - right or wrong - true or false - it is out there and you can read all about it in whichever magazine you pick up or website you want to read.
  What's the solution?  Don't quite know, for you see, I am still chubby.  Depending on which Dr. I ask, just 30 lbs. overweight, to another Dr. 50 lbs..  Who knows, I might find one that tells me I am skinny! 
  Well, to be totally honest, I think I have some answers!  I Timothy 4:1-5 tells us that we should not be commanded by anyone to not eat certain foods, which God has created and we should receive it with thanksgiving (please read this, it is very interesting).  And there are other scriptures that provide answers, but my intention for this post was not a sermon, but to just share the humorous (sometimes not so humorous) side of it all and to encourage each of us to eat according to how God is leading you.
  Until next time..........