Weekly Farming Jokes

Sunday, 21 February 2010

• Weekly Farming Jokes

  Last week, I had come across alot of farming jokes.  I had shared a few last week, but couldn't share all the ones we liked.  So maybe I could share a few each week.  Over the years, we all heard jokes about blondes, Irish, brunettes, polish, etc., but there is a whole bunch of jokes about farmers and farming, also.  Believe me, living on a farm and being farmers is NOT always a joking matter.  You have to love it, or it just does not work.  It is not just your occupation - it is your life.  We have learned that to have a good laugh is truly medicine for the soul.  So, here we go.....have some good laughs.
  
  

  Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
  Because her horn didn't work

  Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon?
  The farmer had cold hands.

  What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?
  Milk of Amnesia

  Why does a milking stool have only three legs?
  Because the cow has the udder.

  Q: What do you call a Cow with no legs.
  A: Ground Beef

  Q: Which job is a cow most suited for?
  A: Baker. Because they're making cow pies regularly.
  Q: Why should you never-ever tell a Cow a secret?
  A: Because it will just go in one ear and out the UDDER
  Until next time.......;

Weekly Farming Jokes

Sunday, 21 February 2010

• Weekly Farming Jokes

  Last week, I had come across alot of farming jokes.  I had shared a few last week, but couldn't share all the ones we liked.  So maybe I could share a few each week.  Over the years, we all heard jokes about blondes, Irish, brunettes, polish, etc., but there is a whole bunch of jokes about farmers and farming, also.  Believe me, living on a farm and being farmers is NOT always a joking matter.  You have to love it, or it just does not work.  It is not just your occupation - it is your life.  We have learned that to have a good laugh is truly medicine for the soul.  So, here we go.....have some good laughs.
  
  

  Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
  Because her horn didn't work

  Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon?
  The farmer had cold hands.

  What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?
  Milk of Amnesia

  Why does a milking stool have only three legs?
  Because the cow has the udder.

  Q: What do you call a Cow with no legs.
  A: Ground Beef

  Q: Which job is a cow most suited for?
  A: Baker. Because they're making cow pies regularly.
  Q: Why should you never-ever tell a Cow a secret?
  A: Because it will just go in one ear and out the UDDER
  Until next time.......;

Farming Jokes

Wednesday, 17 February 2010

• Farming Jokes

  *Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're
  a 1000 miles from the corn field.-Dwight D. Eisenhower,1890-1969
  
  *Little ol' boy in the Panhandle told me the other day you can
  still make a small fortune in agriculture. Problem is, you got
  to start with a large one. - Jim Hightower
  
  *The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
   - Will Rogers, 1879 - 1935 
  Thanks to Tom for sending us the above sayings.   I thought I would add some jokes that I came across.  Hope they lighten your day!
  

  Celebrating an event

  An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that the next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary.
  
  "Let's have a party, Homer," she suggested. "Let's kill a pig."
  
  The farmer scratched his grizzled head. "Gee, Ethel," he finally answered, "I don't see why the pig should take the blame for something that happened fifty years ago."
  

  Pig misunderstanding

  Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered later by a computer tech into their database. One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be an error, the tech called the farmer directly.
  
  "Is it true Mr. (Smith) that you lost 2,025 pigs?" she asked.
  
  "Yeth." lisped the farmer.
  
  Being a Howard County girl herself, the tech entered: "Subject lost 2 sows and 25 pigs."
  

  Winning Nobel prize

  A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing.
  
  The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Ah excuse me mister, but what are you doing?"
  
  The farmer replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
  
  "How?" asks the man, puzzled.
  
  "Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize . . . to people who are out standing in their field."
  Until next time.............

Blizzard of 2010

Wednesday, 10 February 2010

• Blizzard on the Farm

  Yep, we have deep snow here on the farm, just like everywhere else.  When you live on a farm, you cannot just sit in the house and enjoy a day off work.  Nope, the cows still need milked, heifers and calves fed, no matter what the weather is.  So, we dress up real warm and work as fast as we can, so we can get back inside.  There are 2 different crews - inside crew and outside crew.  The inside crew is not too effected by bad weather, as you can see. 
  
  The outside crew, of course, is.   The calves were stranded inside their hutches and the heifers were unable to walk around very easily.  We worked together and accomplished our duties!  And had fun while we were at it!
  
  
  
  
  We certainly do not need the fans in this weather!
  
  Now, this white stuff needs to all melt, dry up and the green grass needs to start growing - then life will be easier on the farm once again.  We do have a big praise though.  We did not lose electric and the winds were not as bad as they were calling for.   AND the boys are feeling much better!  We are very grateful!!
  Until next time......

Confession of Anxiety

Tuesday, 09 February 2010

• Confession of Anxiety

   Yes, I am admitting to having anxiety and yes, I also know that the scriptures say more than once that we are not to worry or be anxious.  Why is it so easy to read those verses, believe what they say, but find it hard to apply them to our daily lives?  The area in my life that brings anxiety is when the children are sick.  Sickness and the Weidenhammers have walked together for a long time.  It started when Ben was born 3 months early  He had alot of respiratory issues and spent the first 2 years of his life on alot of medication, spending time in and out of the hosp. just so he could breathe better.  Solomon was born almost 5 years later and was at deaths door before they realized that he needed heart surgery.  For about 2 years afterwards, he seemed to have croup.  Through testing, they discovered that he had stenosis of the airway, also.   We had to be very aggressive in treating him during any sickness due to the already narrowed airway (thank God, he outgrew that problem).  Georgie comes along and developed RSV before he was 1 yr. old and had to be hospitalized because of not being able to breathe and ever since then, he gets asthma very easy.  When Oliver was born, he had exactly what Solomon had (with his heart and airway) and struggles still with croup.  So needless to say, the thought of respiratory illness strikes a raw nerve in me.  When the boys get sick, I get anxious, sometimes very anxious.  It makes me sick on my stomach, my heart feels like it is going to pound right out of my chest and Dave accuses me of not thinking straight during those times.  I have asked God to deliver me from this many times, but He still has something for me to learn yet, for it is still my battle.  Like Paul had a thorn in the flesh, I guess this is mine.  An even bigger test for me is to have sick children  while being snowed in.  Phobic for sure!!  That is exactly what happened this past weekend.  The 3 boys were sick, tight on their chests, and coughing and coughing while I fought panic watching it snow.  I prayed "Shelter me in the blood of Jesus and cast thou Satan away" for it is him who brings this crippling fear on me.  It is not God,  "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a strong mind".   I am suspicious that the lessons for me to learn yet is that I need to increase my faith, and the need to daily surrender my life, my children's lives, and all situations that arise to the One who is in control.  Satan needs to be rebuked when he comes knocking.  In saying all this, I also realize that worry and concern are the normal reaction of any  mother who has children that are sick or hurt, whether it be temporary or terminal.  So where is the balance?   Can anyone help me out or give their testimony or advice?   Just sharing my heart....
  Until next time...........

Our Baby Turned 7

Thursday, 04 February 2010

• Our Baby Turned 7

  Oliver turned 7 today!  Where, oh where did the time go?  He wanted to decorate his own cake this time and he did a fine job (he asked if I would write Happy Birthday, though).  We celebrated his special day with grandparents, Gordon, Kelsey and Oakley.   We are very grateful to have Oliver as part of our lives and thank God for giving him to us.
  
  Until next time......

Civic's Class Notes - 6th Class

Monday, 01 February 2010

• Civic's Class Notes - 6th class

  January 15, 2010 Class Notes

  We opened class by discussing the experiences the children had when giving their food baskets to the Veteran of their choice.
  Brenda gave a report on Haiti, the earthquake, why Haiti is the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere and what could be done to improve the condition of Haiti.
  Dave started class:
  We now leave European and World History and jump ahead to the American colonies. Mankind’s condition on earth has not changed much up until the discovery of the new world, but after the American War of Independence and the birth of a new nation, mankind now makes a HUGE leap forward in almost every aspect of human existence.
  

  • personal liberties
  • religious liberty
  • financial opportunities
  • education
  • medicine
  • science
  • manufacturing
  • space travel
  • personal comfort

  To name just a few
  How did all these things happen? Did they happen automatically? Certainly not! But rather these were the results of God inspiring the founders with certain ideas and principles upon which to base the new nation’s government. These principles changed the world. We will discuss these principles in greater detail in the following classes.
  Before we do that, we want to point out how America seems to be in decline, because of our obvious wavering from our foundational principles. Some examples of our decline:
  

  • massive debt
  • crime
  • loss of manufacturing
  • devaluation of the dollar

  Good government and a civil society do not happen automatically!!We also took a few minutes to tell the story of Eldridge Cleavor – look up his life for those who do not know him.
  We just briefly ran down a time-line of events that were happening on our continent.
  

  • 1776 – Declaration of Independence
  • 1781 – Articles of Confederation – the United States first attempt at central gov’t
  • 1783 – Revolutionary War ends
  • 1787 – United States Constitution is written

  We discussed the inadequacy of the Articles of Confederation and also the purpose of the Federalist Papers.
  What were the founders discussing in Philadelphia in 1787 as they established the most enduring constitution in history?
  We discussed some of the challenges facing the founders.
  

  • equal representation
  • slavery
  • tariffs
  • commerce
  • currency
  • foreign affairs
  • rights of the people
  • defense
  • etc.

  We now begin to examine the ideas and principles that the founders based their decisions on. First of all, the founders had a different scale upon which they measured political philosophy. The scale we use today, right and left, Republican and Democrat, or conservative or liberal, would have been meaningless to them. They would have measured political ideas on a scale of tyranny on one extreme to anarchy on the other.
  Ruler’s Law                                                                 No Law
  100% ß -----------------------------------------------------à 0%
  Tyranny                                                                       Anarchy
  
  The founder’s goal was to keep this scale well balanced.
  Where would you place our current administration on this scale?
  Basically that was the conclusion of this class. We will continue on Feb. 5^th.
  Until next time...........